Author: MCCAMT00@oneonta.edu

Below are a few more of my diary entries from the beginning of the pandemic. There’s a lot I’d like to comment on now that I’m looking back on it:

March 25^th. 2020

Roughly day nine of self-isolation, I would have had my 8am film class today, followed by Environmental Sustainability at 9am, with a break in classes after usually to go eat, shower/ get ready for the day, then a 12pm video production class. Usually I’d study for the after noon and have dinner with my friends at 7pm and spent the night with Ryan until I went to sleep.

Ryan had an overnight shift last night but a few hours before he had to leave for it, the White House announced anyone who’s left the NYC area within the last 14 days, (this includes Ryan) must self-quarantine for two weeks. So Ryan had to decide whether or not to go in. He’s been working with the public for a few weeks now and only worked after close for the last three days so he decided to go in. The new rule also effects whether or not I can get my things from my dorm when I’m scheduled to on Saturday.

We also found out that my friend Jonathan’s friend has tested positive for COVID, I had seen Jonathan the weekend Ryan came to visit and Jonathan had seen his friend the day before so now I’m hyper aware of  every time I sneeze.

I’ve been way busier with schoolwork than I was expecting, I’m taking a trip to target today I think, after classes, I’m really looking forward to leaving the house. Were taking gloves and hand sanitizer with us just in case.

March 28^th, 2020

I picked up my things from my dorm today, the most excitement we’ve had in a few weeks honestly, and the farthest I’ve been from my house in about a month. I got to see Ryan; I’d be lying if I said there weren’t any tears. I don’t know when I’m going t get to see him again after today, it could be months. That’s the worst part of all this, not knowing when it’ll end, no count down it seems endless and its only going to get worse before it gets better.

I’m happy to have my clothes back, I’d been wearing the same three outfits for the past three weeks, not that I have anything to dress up for, but a nice mix of sweatpants and leggings couldn’t hurt. It has been a week since people have been moving their stuff out of their dorms, my friends across the hall have all moved their things out except for Kiara, it’s a ghost town on campus, everyone’s keeping their distance, getting in and out as fast as we can.

Classes have been going on for about a week now, most professors are keeping us organized and I appreciate that this was thrown on all of us at the same time, one of my classes was video production which was nearly all hands on so I haven’t got anything from that class yet, not sure if I might have to drop it. Schools been keeping me busy and were almost out of March, I’ve stopped watching the news, its helped a lot, nothings getting better.

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There’s so much about this I can’t even believe I wrote looking back, there were so many things I was going to have to worry about besides the variety of clothes I had at home, people were literally dying by the thousands and my biggest concern was my wardrobe, that mind set changed pretty quickly. Also, this was the last time I saw Ryan in person for another two and a half months, even writing that I never could’ve imagined we’d be three and a half months in and still where we are. no one could have predicted this.

I’ve recently been reminded of the diary entries that I wrote at the very beginning of quarantine and I’d like to share them here, maybe some hindsight can help us all find a silver lining in all of this.

March 24^th, 2020

Although this is my first entry, I am roughly a week and one day into self quarantine with my family. I’ve been home from school now two and a half weeks, a week and a half longer than anyone was expecting.

When I left for spring break on March 5^th a world pandemic was nowhere on my mind, nowhere in the news, it was not a possibility. As the week went on the world seemed to change overnight. I left on Friday, by Monday schools were closing, the news was on 24/7, but it still felt temporary, a news story that would pass in a week leaving nothing but some examples of the worst and the best of humanity and a few new memes. By Friday it was practically at my doorstep. The number of cases, especially in New York, have been rising by the hundreds and SUNY schools are officially closed. This was not going away any time soon.

No one was prepared for this, especially my friends from school, other than me and my sister we all live no closer than an hour or two from each other. We knew we’d have to leave for summer, but we still had so much to do. Formals to go to, birthdays to celebrate and for a few of us graduation was around the corner. My few of my friends have all decided to face time once a week to keep in touch, but were still so lonely stuck at home.

I’m away from my boyfriend too. We had a pretty great set up living a dorm away from each other at school but Albany and Staten Island are a bit farther apart. The weekend before everything really shut down he came to visit, just in case he couldn’t by Monday.

He spent three days here, he tried his first New York City bagel and loved it (of course) and I got to show him my high school and he met more of my family it was an amazing weekend, he left Monday, I have no idea when ill get to see him again.

Monday was definitely my worst day, I couldn’t look at social media, any news I just wanted to shut out everything “COVID” “virus” “pandemic” I am incredibly overstimulated i need school to start back up because I cannot take much more of this.

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I’ll continue to add some of my older entries that still feel relevant, this entry feels like it was written in a different decade, so much has happened since.

Maggie McCann || April 26^th, 2020

I gave myself a haircut this morning. I should’ve gotten one when I got home from school, I needed one desperately so I did it myself, checking off all the boxes on quarantine bingo this week, I’ve made at least five new kinds of cocktails this past weekend, I cut and bleached my hair, I’ve stayed in my house over 48 hours, it feel so incredibly normal now I’ve completely stopped being aware how long weve been quarantined its been weeks since I’ve left my house past my backyard.

I have a week left of classes, finals start tomorrow I’m not sure what life’s going to look like when I have no classes, my mom said me and my sister might be able to start working with her again at her job, we’d be going in to help clear our the office since they payed out their lease while no ones been going in. anything is better than the alternative of completely unscheduled days for an undetermined amount of time, no amount of arts and crafts could fill up that many days.

Maggie McCann || April 24^th, 2020

Not much has been going on, I wake up, go to online classes, practice some guitar and hang around on tiktok, youtube, reading until 8 when I either skype with Ryan or watch TV with my family.

Waking up this morning was a bit different though, around 6am I was half awake I probably would’ve went right back to sleep but the loudest and fastest fly I have EVER encountered started flying over my head I’ve never woke up so quickly at 6am I spent a god 30 minutes trying to find it in my room and once I did I couldn’t manage to kill it . It chased me out of my room I slept the next two hours on the couch downstairs. That’s the most exciting thing hats happened all week.

Maggie McCann || April 22^nd, 2020

Its earth day! Finally something to celebrate! After my Environmental Sustainability class this semester I’ve learned way more about how to take better care of the planet. We don’t use plastic bottles or straws at my house, we just planted a garden for spring. We don’t have a lot of clean energy though, our house is mostly gas and electric powered from a grid, my future house is definitely going to be solar powered, I’m trying to get my parents to stop using fertilizers and weve started composting. I really want to keep up learning how to preserve the environment. Especially being in New York and having the Staten Island beaches to clean up there’s a lot I can do.

Its been another slow day at home, I’ve been doing a lot more painting, I spent a few hours today after classes painting mushrooms for whatever reason, I saw a pretty painting of mushrooms on Pinterest last night and I’ve been thinking about it all day so I did some of my own. Once classes are over I’m going to be doing a lot more crafts and practicing guitar, it’ll be really weird not to have any deadlines, I cant remember the last time I didn’t have something due. I cant tell if it will be nice or I’ll go insane.

Maggie McCann || April 20^th, 2020

Nothing not worthy has been going on recently I’ve spent every day at home, I’ve stopped counting how many days weve been quarantined, its over a month now. My sisters sneaking out tonight to a bonfire with Jonathan, she’s wearing a mask and gloves I’m not sure how much they’re social distancing though.

I’m a bit nervous, I’ve stopped going to stores “just t get out” because its not even enjoyable anymore everyone’s nervous the lines are wrapped around blocks, not because everyone’s getting to the stores but because they’re only letting a few people in at a time and the people on line have to wait sic feet apart. Last time I went to a store was to get hair dye for grace, we died and bleached her hair about a week ago, we went to target first, forgetting about the lines and we showed up and couldn’t understand what was going on but once we remembered we tried CVS, the line wasn’t as long they were letting in only half capacity at a time, we got our hair dye and got the hell out. Its not fun outside anymore.

Maggie McCann || April 19^th, 2020

So I’ve decided when I graduate I’m living in a school bus. I’ve seen a lot of videos online recently of people living completely sustainably, shopping at farmers markets, using solar energy, driving around wherever they want. It seems wonderfully natural and clean and so cute, it seems like a hell of a lot of work, renovating a bus, having to insulate the whole thing, install electricity, hot water, decorating, but it would be so worth it and it would be a really cool adventure. I’m imagining all of this with Ryan too, we could keep it somewhere with good fishing, he’s said he wants to stay upstate, what better place to keep a bus than upstate at a campsite, they have free campsites upstate! We could even stay close to Albany so we could have actual jobs, I could easily be hired for mostly remote online work. We could cook all out own food and it wouldn’t have to be forever but wed save so much money on rent and heating and electricity. My dad’s a plumber he could hep me insolate and install all the important stuff and a wood fire stove is so much more sustainable than gas, I wouldn’t even mind hunting and fishing if it was strictly for eating, and it would be so CUTE then we’d also have so much more money for travelling and a real house in the future. Not really sure if this is what people are going to want to be archived for future generations but if your looking for me in five years ill be living in a bus in Albany.

Maggie McCann || April 16^th, 2020

Todays been incredibly uneventful, I’ve stopped keeping count of how many days I’ve been at the house. I woke up this morning around 9am, made eggs and vegetables for breakfast. I’ve been watching YouTube in the mornings instead of news in the mornings, Buzzfeed unsolved mostly. I’ve had a lot more time to spend on things I like to do, I’ve been getting back into true crime documentaries and podcasts, I’ve had so much more time for podcast’s its been great. I have about a week left of school before finals. Today, like most days, I had breakfast, watched some YouTube and started schoolwork at 11am.

Todays Thursday so its my busier day, I had Comparative International Politics at 12 and European History at 2:30 and some assignments so I worked on all that until 4pm. I’ve managed to keep my eating and sleeping schedule intact so far, I try to have three meals a day, today I had lunch at 2pm, granola bar, almond butter and an apple, worst thing being home is I never know when to stop drinking coffee, it always feels like the morning until 5pm, weve almost run out of coffee a few times now, not knowing if the stores will have any normal coffee is a big fear of mine recently, I’ve definitely got in easier than most with problems like that. The rest of they day I’m probably going to spend reading, watching tiktoks and tonight I have a skype call with Ryan, its been about a month now since weve seen eachother, doesn’t look like well be together for our half a year anniversary, it wouldn’t be that big a deal if we weren’t so sure wed be together for it when this all started, I miss his so so much.

Maggie McCann || April 15^th, 2020

            We learned about the WWII mass observation journals that these COVID journals are based on in class today. It was jarring, unsettling, fascinating, I never could have imagined a few months ago that I would be in a time even remotely like WWII and here I am personally understanding a journal written by a girl in 1939. I found this project incredibly fascinating when I first started and the thought that one day my journal may be in a collection like the mass observation journals were reading is unbelievable. I was writing some of these journals yesterday before reading the WWII journals for class and having everything so fresh and seeing all the similarities was incredibly unsettling and made this whole situation seem much bigger.

The WWII journals we read were written by a girl named Muriel Green, she was 18 in 1939 living in Norfolk. She mentions the depressiveness of businesses not being what they used to be, like all the stores closing at the beginning of the pandemic. She also writes about rationing, and as were not rationing yet this is definitely a bit worse than we have it we are seeing echoes of that today, the shortages in supermarkets, the hesitation to even go to supermarkets. And I feel I have to keep reiterating, this is absolutely not as bad as the second world war, I’m not sure there are many things that could be worse than atrocities of the second world war but reading civilian journals, seeing the war from a far, it feels a lot like what were going through now.

There was also a bit of the journals that discussed Muriel going to a meeting in the city. At this point civilians had been given gas masks in order to protect themselves from the tear gas that was constantly covering city streets. Muriel mentions that her and others were holding their gas masks but at the risk of seeming too over dramatic they were not putting them on, the gas subsided and they continued on without them until she got to the meeting where they were hit with a room full of tear gas. No one had worn their gas masks as directed and because of this they all got hit with tear gas very badly, Muriel even writes “I suppose it was a case of feeling ‘silly’ to put one on when other people had not got theirs on” sounds eerily familiar doesn’t it? Everyone dismissing face masks and gloves to avoid seeming over dramatic, until it was too late.

Maggie McCann || April 14^th, 2020

Woke up around 10am today, I’m finding it less and less important to get up at a certain time, I know that’ll catch up with me, a schedule is a very important way to stay sane. We had a facetime call with my grandmother this morning, she’s in a hospice nursing home, last time I saw her was a few days before her home got locked down, my mom, sister, aunt and I all stopped by for a few hours, this was well before anyone was wearing masks or staying home but they had us use hand sanitizer, asked us where wed been in the last two weeks and took our temperature. We found out a few days ago two workers and a resident had tested positive, we expect its more from what weve heard nursing home have not been forthcoming with how far the virus has spread and we unfortunately don’t expect much different from “The Manor”  but were just hoping the best for my grandma and were talking with her as often as we can. Not that there’s anything to talk about, I told her I scheduled my classes for next semester at least three times, my mom went through every plant in our new garden and I think my dad went through the particulars of his day by the half hour, and we still had 20 minutes of video call to fill. There’s nothing to talk about, nothing new is happening accept the death toll is rising and more things are being closed. I really can’t imagine how this is affecting everyone’s mental health.

I’ve certainly gone a bit off the rails a few times now. I did a face mask last night, highlight of my week and I sent my boyfriend at least 20 snapchats of the process, this morning I danced to nothing while I made vegetables and eggs for breakfast for the 4^th day in a row. Might as well be Groundhog Day, that might honestly be better than the progressive severity of everything. These journals are really helping me keep track of days and somewhat understand how I’m feeling, at least be aware of it, if not I might just forget what day it is all together. Everyday seems to have that weird Sunday afternoon anxiety, even the weekends don’t feel much different apart from drinking after 5pm. And I know there are plenty of people who have it much worse, I’m not a nurse or a doctor, everyone in my family is safe and healthy but that doesn’t mean I’m not scared, overwhelmed, overstimulated by the news, the numbers being thrown at us just getting bigger and more unimaginable by the day, and I’ve stopped listening to the president all together, the nonsense spewing out of him and his twitter has nearly sent me to tears more than a few times, I am lucky to be living in new York, we’re at the epicenter of the whole thing but at least Mayor De Blasio and Governor Cuomo are sane I seriously think they’re doing the best they can and I am so grateful to be able to trust them rather than the bumbling idiot in the White House…

Speaking of going of the rails… these journals may just devolve into therapy sessions with myself.

Maggie McCann || April 12^th, 2020, Easter.

            Weirdest Easter to date. To have something to look forward to my family decided to do a small brunch, my mom made a vegetarian egg casserole, I made a vegan oatmeal bake and we got bagels, lox, spreads and lots of champagne and orange juice. I was home last year for Easter I was planning on coming home from school this year for the weekend, we usually switch each year from my Mom’s side of the family to my Dad’s we were already planning on having a much smaller Easter than usual, we were going to my Grandparent’s house and do the usual Easter diner, we still do an Easter egg hunt because we have a few little cousins in the family, soon It’ll be my older cousins kids were doing it for. My grandma always makes way too much Italian food, her way of reminding us were not completely Irish. She is from Malta, grew up in Brooklyn, but my family consists of a bunch of blonde haired blue eyed men and my Grandpas still got his Irish accent, so she reminds us were not completely Irish from her amazing chicken cutlets, stuffed shells, sausage and peppers its watered down Italian but its still amazing, thinking about it is making my mouth water. But we didn’t have that this year, this year we had bagels lox and champagne from 12pm to 10pm because we finally had something to celebrate.

A few days ago, my parents and I started the garden in our backyard, something else to keep us busy especially once classes ended. There’s no end in sight for any of this so it’ll be me and the basil plants until further notice. I’m starting to get used to being home, the option of leaving is still missed but I’ve picked up guitar again, I’m slowly remembering how to play its been a few years but I’m enjoying it, I think my dad is too he’s been desperate to get me or my sister to start playing an instrument again.

There’s two more weeks ahead of me until finals week, I have a music video project draft and an environmental sustainability assignment due tomorrow, I was planning on doing them today, that did not happen, although there seems to be no end in sight the passing of time still shows me were closer to that end date than we were yesterday, whenever that end date may be.

Maggie McCann || April 8^th, 2020

As if things couldn’t possibly get any worse, they did. Bernie dropped out of the democratic primary today. Which means I’m going to have to vote for Biden, all of this cannot be good for my mental health. Ryan is especially upset, he’s been a hard Bernie supporter since 2015, he said he just wanted to able to vote for him once, even in a primary, even if he knew he wasn’t going to win, and now he doesn’t have that chance. Katie said she’s not going to vote at all, when she said it I jumped on her, everyone in the group chat did, it’s essential that we vote, even if we have to vote for Biden its better than not voting at all, but I understand where she’s coming from, it feels hopeless, we all said we don’t even want to have children if T*ump stays for another term. But we shouldn’t have jumped on Katie, its just as bad as not voting, were all in this together.

I’m skyping Ryan tonight, we haven’t talked in a few days besides texting, we need something to distract ourselves from the Bernie news, were going to watch Doctor Strange plan on drinking quite a bit tonight after , I’ve been doing that recently, drinking, we all have actually, there’s lots of  jokes online, there’s a sting of drink tutorials on tiktok and twitter, it’s a weird side effect of social distancing, were all unemployed and stressed as hell and liquor stores are some of the few stores still open so, were drinking.

Maggie McCann || April 6^th, 2020

It’s my cousin’s birthday today, she’s turning 19. We would usually have had a big party at her house, lots of food, lots of alcohol. Today we drove by at 4pm and wished her a happy birthday from our car window. It was a beautiful day today too, we would’ve been out in her backyard until two in the morning, my Aunt barbecuing, my Uncle keeping the fire going, I probably would’ve invited Ryan down, I’m looking forward to bringing him to a family barbecue, this summer well probably be having one every weekend to make up for this.

Or maybe not. Going to the store today to pick up a card for Steph I didn’t even get out of the car, everyone was wearing masks, I wouldn’t’ve gotten close to anyone, but the fear of being in a public place was enough to keep me put. What happens when this is all over, will we every be comfortable to hug eachother again? Hold the door for a stranger? Maybe well have parties again, we might go to movies like we used to, but things won’t feel the same. There’s no problem with being a bit more cautious, if we want to keep gloves on hand why don’t we, but I don’t know if well be ale to socialize the way we all used to, not if this goes on for much longer.

I miss Ryan a lot, we’ve been skyping quite a bit, almost every other day, hes still working at the supermarket, he’s been busier than ever, he stocks so thankfully hes in the back, not working with customers. I haven been in a store in about three weeks, I don’t know what they look like now. I can’t wait to see him again, I cant wait to see my friends from school either, weve been skyping once a week, we’ve not much to talk about other than what we wish we were doing and what we have to do instead. Weve all taken up hobbies, I picked up my guitar again, Julie’s taking extra cello lessons. Grace has been drawing a bunch more and just ordered strings for her Ukulele, and if all those hobbies fail to keep us entertained, I’ve been trying to lean a tiktok dance for the past week.

Maggie McCann || April 1^st 2020

We’ve made it. Were out of March. The year long month. I cannot believe its only April. Both the passing of days and the world outside have slowed to a snail’s pace, or at least in the city it has. I can imagine things are feeling a bit less apocalyptic outside the city and New Jersey, were seriously in the epicenter here and every day I hear of a new person, a friend of a friend, a co-workers aunt, a sisters boyfriend, all testing positive, its creeping closer and closer.

I left my house for the first time in four days today its starting to get nice out so were taking walks, my family and I. we took a ride down to Lemon Creek park, it’s the best my family and I have gotten along in days, my dads started working every other day at work so were all staring to get exceedingly stir crazy ad were taking it out on eachother. But today we went on a walk, the birds were all nesting in the group of bird houses in the park, we spent a while watching those, we recreated a picture of my sister, my dad and I from maybe ten years ago, and we walked the beach for about a half hour. My parents told me about an old factory that used to sit right on the water, they hung out there with their friends in the 80’s until it burned to the ground in ’97.

We stopped by my grandparent’s house, we stood at the curb while my grandparents barely stepped out of their doorway. the one thing everyone keeps asking is “are you going to the store?” or “do you need something from the store?” this time it was my grandma asking my mom for detergent, coffee and paper towels (if there were any) we stood and talked for a while until we all went back home.

We’ve made it. We’re out of March. The year long month. I cannot believe it’s only April. Both the passing of days and the world outside have slowed to a snail’s pace, or at least in the city it has. I can imagine things are feeling a bit less apocalyptic outside the city and New Jersey. We’re seriously in the epicenter here and every day I hear of a new person, a friend of a friend, a co-workers aunt, a sisters boyfriend, all testing positive. It is creeping closer and closer.

I left my house for the first time in four days today. It is starting to get nice out so we’re taking walks, my family and I. We took a ride down to Lemon Creek par. It’s the best my family and I have gotten along in days. My dad has started working every other day at work so we’re all starting to get exceedingly stir crazy and were taking it out on each other. But today we went on a walk. The birds were all nesting in the group of bird houses in the park and we spent a while watching those. We recreated a picture of my sister, my dad and I from maybe ten years ago, and we walked the beach for about a half hour. My parents told me about an old factory that used to sit right on the water, they hung out there with their friends in the 80’s until it burned to the ground in ’97.

We stopped by my grandparent’s house, we stood at the curb while my grandparents barely stepped out of their doorway. The one thing everyone keeps asking is “Are you going to the store?” or “Do you need something from the store?” this time it was my grandma asking my mom for detergent, coffee and paper towels (if there were any) we stood and talked for a while until we all went back home.

Maggie McCann || March 28^th, 2020

I picked up my things from my dorm today, the most excitement weve had in a few weeks honestly, and the farthest I’ve been from my house in about a month. I got to see Ryan; I’d be lying if I said there weren’t any tears. I don’t know when I’m going t get to see him again after today, it could be months. That’s the worst part of all this, not knowing when it’ll end, no count down it seems endless and its only going to get worse before it gets better.

I’m happy to have my clothes back, id been wearing the same three outfits for the past three weeks, not that I have anything to dress up for, but a nice mix of sweatpants and leggings couldn’t hurt. Its been a week since people have been moving their stuff out of their dorms, my friends across the hall have all moved their things out except for Kiara, it’s a ghost town on campus, everyone’s keeping their distance, getting in and out as fast as we can.

Classes have been going on for about a week now, most professors are keeping us organized and I appreciate that this was thrown on all of us at the same time, one of my classes was video production which was nearly all hands on so I haven’t got anything from that class yet, not sure if I might have to drop it. Schools been keeping me busy and were almost out of March, I’ve stopped watching the news, its helped a lot, nothings getting better.

Maggie McCann || March 25^th. 2020

Roughly day nine of self-isolation, I would have had my 8am film class today, followed by Environmental Sustainability at 9am, with a break in classes after usually to go eat, shower/ get ready for the day, then a 12pm video production class. Usually id study for the after noon and have dinner with my friends at 7pm and spent the night with Ryan until I went to sleep.

Ryan had an overnight shift last night but a few hours before he had to leave for it the shift the White House announced anyone who’s left the NYC area within the last 14 days, this includes Ryan, must self-quarantine for two weeks. So Ryan had to decide whether or not to go in. He’s been working with the public for a few weeks now and only worked after close for the last three days so he decided to go in. The new rule also effects whether or not I can get my things from my dorm when im scheduled to on Saturday.

We found out too that my friend, and my sister boyfriend Jonathan’s friend has tested positive for COVID, I had seen Jonathan the weekend Ryan came to visit and Jonathan had seen his friend the day before so now I’m hyper aware of  every time I sneeze.

I’ve been way busier with schoolwork than I was expecting, I’m taking a trip to target today I think, after classes, I’m really looking forward to leaving the house. Were taking gloves and hand sanitizer with us just in case.

Maggie McCann || March 24^th, 2020

Although this is my first entry, I am roughly a week and one day into self quarantine with my family. I’ve been home from school now two and a half weeks, a week and a half longer than anyone was expecting.

When I left for spring break on March 5^th a world pandemic was nowhere on my mind, nowhere in the news, it was not a possibility. As the week went on the world seemed to change overnight. I left on Friday, by Monday schools were closing, the news was on 24/7, but it still felt temporary, a news story that would pass in a week leaving nothing but some examples of the worst and the best of humanity and a few new memes. By Friday it was practically at my doorstep. The number of cases, especially in New York, have been rising by the hundreds day and SUNY schools are officially closed. This was not going away any time soon.

No one was prepared for this, especially my friends from school, other than me and my sister we all live no closer than an hour or two from eachother. We knew we’d have to leave for summer, but we still had so much to do. Formals to go to, birthdays to celebrate and for a few of us, Julie, Karla, and so many more people I know, graduation was around the corner. My friends Julie, Katie and Adalyne, weve all decided to facetime once a week to keep in touch, but were still so lonely stuck at home.

I’m away from my boyfriend too, Ryan. We had a pretty great set up living a dorm away from each other at school but Albany and Staten Island are a bit farther apart. The weekend before everything really shut down he came to visit, just incase he couldn’t by Monday.

He spent three days here, e tried his first New York City bagel and loved it (of course) and I got to show him my highschool and he met more of my family it was an amazing weekend, he left Monday, I have no idea when ill get to see him again.

Monday was definitely my worst day, I couldn’t look at social media, any news I just wanted to shut out everything “COVID” “virus” “pandemic” I am incredibly overstimulated i need school to start back up because I cannot take much more of this.